Archive for 'Frustrations'

Top 10 Stupid Questions for Expats In The Philippines

Top 10 Stupid Questions for Expats In The Philippines

A friend of mine posted a link to 21 Questions Asian People Are Sick Of Answering which really is funny and worth checking out.  But made me think of the stupid questions I get as an expat living in the Philippines:

#1 What Hotel Are You Staying In?

I live here! I’ve lived here 9 years.  Not all crackers are tourists!

#2 Is Your Name Joe? (or simply “hey Joe!”)

Not all foreigners are named ...

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Darth Vader’s #2 In The Philippines

Darth Vader’s #2 In The Philippines

Today I felt like combining two of my favorite things:  Star Wars humor and ripping on the Philippines.  For those not living here you wouldn’t understand but the reality is “toilet paper” isn’t very popular here.  Instead they use a small plastic ladle called a tabo and a bucket of water:

iwebshitter

If they do have toilet paper you can’t put the used material in the toilet but instead have to put it ...

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OUCH!

OUCH!

So a week a ago I rode my motorcycle up to Subic to visit my wife and kids who were there on vacation. Once I got there I had what I THOUGHT was an ingrown hair on my right thigh. So as I normally do I “popped” it. Um, it got worse. WAY WORSE. Two days later it was as big around as a slice of pepperoni. That was the dark red, swollen part. Then another six inches or so ...

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I Miss Bologna Sandwiches!

I Miss Bologna Sandwiches!

Don’t know why tonight I’m in touch w/ my inner white-trash / redneck self but FUCK I wish I had a bologna sandwich.  The ingredients are so SIMPLE:

white_bread bologna
american_cheese mayo mustard

 

That’s it. ...

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Office Toilet Paper Thief Finally Foiled!

Office Toilet Paper Thief Finally Foiled!

Someone from another office on our floor keeps stealing our toilet paper from the shared bathroom.  I don’t understand why we even have this problem.   Most people around here don’t even use toilet paper:

Heh, that’s not from my current office building, but a good representation of what is normally found here.

Anyway, every time we left TP in the CR (comfort room) it wound up gone.  I did research how to make ...

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